Parental Split

After a discussion with a friend who had gone through what I am going through, I realized that I am parenting my parents.

When I grew up, I was not allowed to fight with my sibling. I would be disciplined if I was to talk about him in a bad way and I heard the following quote more than once…

If you can’t say anything nice… don’t say anything at all

Now, I am finding myself on the other side of the fence. Though I often find myself internally agreeing with what my parent is saying about the other, I am finding myself having to change topics of conversation, even shutting it down completely.

I talked to my wife about it and we realized that our feelings toward one parent were being shaped by the words of the other. It isn’t fair when we are only hearing one side, and it is difficult on our own marriage as we are spending way too much time discussing it, even on our own.

So from yesterday on… no more.